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Alumnae giving

This Giving Tuesday, We Celebrate Bryn Mawr

#GivingTuesday is our chance to give back to Bryn Mawr.

#GivingTuesday is important, because it gives us a time to stop and give thanks for all the people, events, educators, and institutions that made us who we are. We give thanks for people and things we love, as well as the people and things that cause us to change, adapt, and grow under difficult circumstances. Growth that occurs in response to challenges confers strength. Growth in response to challenges makes us adaptable. Adaptability makes us durable. For these reasons I give thanks for my Bryn Mawr education.

Bryn Mawr Helps Students “Learn How to Learn”

Following our graduation (1974), I read my diploma, and was bewildered, wondering what it meant. Deciding to get an answer to my question, I walked up to “Mary Pat” McPherson, held up my diploma, and asked: “What does this mean?” She smiled and responded wisely, “It means that you have learned how to learn.” Looking back over my life and in sharing life-stories with classmates, I understand how that statement perfectly describes Bryn Mawr’s gift to her students. Bryn Mawr’s rigorous curriculum teaches analytical skills that yield powerful tools for creative problem-solving. Life in the latter half of the 20th Century and in the dawning decades of the 21st Century, was/ are filled with challenges that make or break lives. A Bryn Mawr education makes successful navigation of life’s challenges more likely, because the skill of learning how to learn is evergreen. Knowing how to learn is a lifelong lifesaver.

A Woman’s Place Is Everywhere

This is when I first understood the positive influence Bryn Mawr has in our lives:  After graduation, I started first year classes at the University of Pennsylvania School of Medicine, (now, Perelman School of Medicine). Following class lectures, there was usually a mass exit and entry into the locker area. Once, I remember looking back over my shoulder. I caught a glimpse of some of my female classmates walking submissively (looking down), behind a group of male students. They were supposed to be walking together, but the women in the group walked behind the men. I was horrified and mystified, wondering what would make a woman choose to walk behind men with her head bowed down. Looking back on that small incident, I see how Bryn Mawr helped me develop a strong, positive, internal dialogue that reaffirms (again and again), that my place as a woman (yes, and as a black woman, too), is wherever I want to be. I don’t have to walk behind anybody. I can lead. My place isn’t “over there,” My “place” is everywhere!

Importance of Giving Back

To tell the truth, it took me years (okay, decades), to stop being an alumna Scrooge. Why? Because I was angry about all the ways I thought the College had fallen short. Then, I changed my mind, and decided to start giving back because of all the things Bryn Mawr does right. A main example of why I changed my mind can be summed up in two words: Hurricane Matthew.

In 2016, Hurricane Matthew barreled down upon the state of SC. The governor gave orders for everyone in the Low Country to evacuate. I was nervous, because this was the first time our community had ever been required to evacuate in response to a storm threat. Also, this was my first year without my parents. My father died in 2013. I moved home to care for my mother, who was very strong physically and mentally. My father was a master chef, so I wanted to be able to cook for Mom in the manner to which she was accustomed. Not long after I moved home, Mom was diagnosed with breast cancer. Somehow we managed to make even chemo fun. I worked remotely while being a cheerleader and caregiver. Mom and I had many cherished, good moments. She died at home on a cold December morning in 2015. My brother Grady, my sister Bess, and I were at her bedside.

Help Came From an Unexpected Place: Bryn Mawr

After Mom died, I became the knowledge worker and caregiver for my brother Lennie, who had a stroke that rendered him mute and bed-bound. He was very well-cared for at a nursing home in Savannah, GA. I visited him weekly, and stayed with him whenever he was hospitalized, which was often. When Matthew hit, Lennie was evacuated to another facility in Macon. The logistics of his relocation was challenging. Needless to say, I had to steel myself against fear of the unknown. I packed my bags and prepared for my neighbor, his wife and brother, to pick me up. The plan was to travel west, but storm-tracking software showed the hurricane threat reaching deep into the Western US. Not having a place to go, I decided to search for hotels and Air BnBs online, as we traveled. It seemed nowhere was safe.

On the day of our departure, the sky was dark and rain had started to fall. I got a direct message via Facebook, from BMC classmate, Susan Goldstein. Susan asked if I was safe. She said that if we didn’t have a place to go, my traveling companions and I were welcome to stay at her home, in the northern part of SC.  I accepted her offer for help. She texted me her address. With the help of GPS software, we navigated our way safely through the storm, to Susan’s home. My three companions and I arrived to find a big pot of delicious (vegan) vegetable soup, home made bread, and wine. Susan was such a gracious host. We had a great time, although there was no lack of drama from the storm! The safety and serenity of her home is reflected in the art work below. “Ancestral Pillows, Pillars,” is a photo montage that I created based on the self-portrait I took while laying down on my comfy bed in Susan’s home. I used a vintage portrait of my mother, Jenniese Lights, and her sister, Wilhelmina German, to cover the pillow beneath my head. The artwork was included in the “Wild Cuts” exhibit at Woman Made Gallery in Chicago, (2017). Susan’s generosity lives on in my art. Art, photography, and graphic design were things that I taught myself, because I learned how to learn. Thank you, Bryn Mawr!

The point of this story is to say that sometimes when you’re in trouble, help comes from unexpected places. For me, that unexpected place was Bryn Mawr. Never in my life would I have expected that any BMC classmate cared enough for my soul that they would extend a helping hand, despite the presence of danger all around. I was wrong. When telling my brother Grady (Haverford ’73), about my Hurricane Matthew  journey, he was amazed and said: “That BMC/ ‘Ford connection is strong!!!” He was right.

"Ancestral Pillows, Pillars," © 2016 Verneda Lights
“Ancestral Pillows, Pillars,” © 2016 Verneda Lights.

 

More Blessed to Give

Reflecting on Bryn Mawr this #GivingTuesday, I must say that there are many reasons why I give. Having a BMC classmate who cared enough to get me and three traveling companions out of harms’ way,  is a big reason to give. There’s no telling what could have happened to us if we did not have safe harbor during the worst part of the storm. Another reason I give is because it feels good. It feels good to know that giving to the College provides funds that make it possible for them to continue to offer the excellent education I received. Alumnae giving is a reflection of deep thought and high esteem that broadcasts our confidence in Bryn Mawr to the world at large. No, Bryn Mawr College is not perfect. No one and no institution is. But it is the place where I learned to learn. What I learned at Bryn Mawr helped me to acquire the skills I needed to be a caregiver. It helped me  to segue from medicine to visual art and photography. It is a place where others learned to value me, just as I  learned to value them. Please take time to give, now. Here is the link to give: https://www.brynmawr.edu/giving/how-give-what-give

Match for a Million

The Match for a Million is a new alumnae giving initiative. Beginning today, (December 1st), a generous donor will match all new and increased alumnae donations, up to $500,000.  The match period lasts as long as it takes to get to  the $500,00 mark. May we reach our goal, soon!

The gift of a Bryn Mawr education is the gift that keeps on giving.

 

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Alumnae giving Func raising Uncategorized

My Life as a Beggar

Carrie M. Buchanan and Gale Rutan, (BMC '74)
Carrie Buchanan and Gale Rutan, at the breakfast table during the Volunteer Summit (BMC, 2018).

When I retired and moved near Bryn Mawr, I volunteered to help the college.  I figure that I got a good education at Bryn Mawr; it was time to give back.  So, I became one of the class collectors.  This being a “big year,“ (45th upcoming reunion), this task involved contacting former classmates and asking them to contribute towards our class gift.

At first, I was hesitant.  The phone calls were psychologically hard, and the conversation on my part was awkward.  I was not used to asking for money.  After all, we are Bryn Mawr women, independent and self-reliant.  Ask for money?  Ask for a handout?  Never!  That’s exactly what I felt like I was doing.  A classmate with a wonderfully wicked sense of humor called me one of the designated “class beggars.”  We laughed at that shared witticism, but really, when she said that, it broke the ice.  Yes, I am one of your designated class beggars.

A “Reunion Before a Reunion”

But I am learning.  In truth, I have come to enjoy these phone calls and to reconnect with classmates.  I have learned so much about the women who are my fellow classmates for whom I care deeply.  It is truly a reunion-before-a-reunion, a one-on-one conversation, and an excuse to reconnect with some fantastic women who comprise the BMC class of ‘74.

I have called about 15 women so far.  I hope to make more phone calls and to write more e-mails to reconnect with many of you prior to reunion.  I have learned to expect to spend some time talking to our fellow classmates should I reach you on the telephone.  When that happens, the years melt away.  It is not like asking for a donation for any other type of organization, because Bryn Mawr is so small that we usually know the person we are calling.  We have a shared value: supporting younger women in our feminist tradition, enabling them to become strong, decisive, and knowledgeable members of society.  I mention that tuition alone does not cover the cost of a Bryn Mawr education.

Fundraising Determines College Rankings!

I did not know until I volunteered to be a fundraiser that college rankings are partly based on the percentage of alumnae/i who donate to their school after graduation, no matter the amount of the donation.  I try to emphasize that in my contacts. (Some of the answers that I get are: “But that is so unfair!” Well, yes, it is, but that is the formula. I wish it were not so, but I do not have the power to change it.  So we just have to live with it [for now]).

Expect to spend time on these phone calls if you reach a classmate or a classmate returns your call. It is truly a mini-reunion. I have heard about the joys of grandparenthood, the sadness of losing a spouse. I have received and given solace.  I have heard what BMC alumns are doing around the country to raise funds for the college.  I hear about the activities of local Bryn Mawr alumnae clubs in cities around the country.  There are moments of shared humor, such as accepting the moniker of “class beggar.“  (“Well, if the shoe fits…”). I accept the challenge!  Thank you for sharing your impromptu news with me and for letting me into your lives.

It is a privilege to actually make these contacts.  It is a gift of time, both received and given.

Reconnecting Has Benefits

I still have some hesitancy, some awkwardness, but the benefits of reconnecting with all of you outweigh my uneasiness.  Why should we need an excuse to reconnect with classmates?  The conversations are easy, even after 45 years!  And, they are a joy.  Life seems so busy that we procrastinate, saying that we can call so-and-so tomorrow.  But tomorrow comes and goes and the phone call is not made, and in fact it is never made.  One of my classmates lived in the same city as I did 30 years ago.  She invited me for Thanksgiving dinner, and I had the best of intentions to reciprocate, but life got busy.  Then we both lived in another city at the same time, but again life got busy.  But at least there were phone calls! 

Thank you, Class of ‘74, for supporting us, your class collectors, in making these contacts.  Thank you for answering your phones or calling back.  But most of all, thank you for your financial support for Bryn Mawr.

Making these phone calls has been a blessing.  It has been an enriching experience to reconnect with all of you, my fellow classmates.  I am glad I did it, and I would recommend to all my classmates to make a few phone calls.  It is an enriching experience.  It is time well spent in supporting each other as well as in supporting the next generation of women.

Anassa kata!

Your classmate,

Gale Rutan

(BMC ’74)

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Bryn Mawr College, Class of 1974: Women of Today

According to Bryn Mawr College’s Admissions Office: “Bryn Mawr students are driven, courageous, confident, insightful, and enthusiastic. They are young women who are intellectually curious in the classroom and purposeful about what they do in the future.” This description is for the class of 2022. Even though I graduated from Bryn Mawr 45 years ago, I know that this description fits the members of my class as well.

Educational Excellence in the Midst of Change

The women of the class of 1974 arrived at Bryn Mawr at a time when our country was waking up to the need for equality and opportunities for women and minorities. Bryn Mawr’s classes of the 60s and 70s came to its campus during the “Women’s Liberation” and Civil Rights Movements. Through its rigorous courses, women in my class, like those before and after, acquired strong critical thinking skills and a life-long commitment to learning that facilitates adaptability in the midst of change. Today’s Bryn Mawr students are similarly challenged to confront the demands of education in the midst of turbulent times.

Educational Excellence Demands Sustainability

Preparing women scholars to lead with compassion, integrity, and excellence, requires funding in order to be sustainable. The women of the class of 1974 are dedicated alumnae who recognize this. That is why we challenge all our class members to offer gifts that will help Bryn Mawr meet the needs of 78% of its students in the class of 2022, who receive some form of financial aid. Because of Bryn Mawr’s dedication to excellence in education, we ask for your contributions. Your gift of any amount will facilitate the empowerment of women of today. There are three ways you can give:

  1. To donate electronically (via  credit card or Apple Pay), click on the “Give Today” button at the end of the video.
  2. For further convenience, you can make a gift over the phone. You can reach the Bryn Mawr Fund office at 610-526-5127.
  3. You can also give via a check. Please mail your check to:
The Bryn Mawr Fund
101 N. Merion Avenue
Helfarian
Bryn Mawr, PA
19010

Your gift of any amount will be much appreciated. Click here to give today!

-Verneda (“Rikki”) Lights

(Digital Griot, BMC ’74)